What I want from us is empty our minds/We fake the thoughts, and fracture the times

Black armband for Baseball
Today I am hypothetically packing up my Minnesota Twins baseball t-shirts and giant foam finger. I am lovingly folding them whilst wiping the solitary tear away. You may think I am over-reacting but anyone who has spent a millisecond discussing baseball with me will understand. Being neither a “fair weather fan” nor a “part-time fan” this latest blow in off-season trades and rumors is breaking my wee little heart. Well, to the Pohlad’s and Bill Smith’s of this world: You better know what the hell you are doing. Otherwise, my giant foam finger may find a new home (a mild threat, I know.)

The latest trade
Gone: Garza (with his huge potential), Barty, Minor League Pitcher Morlan (instead of Rincon, who Bill Smith says “There is nothing wrong with Juan Rincon, he might pitch Winter Ball. He’s fine.” Oh, Mr. Smith must not have watched the last dozen games he pitched in.)

New: Delmon Young (which should be interesting to watch him interact with the Club. We’ll see if he adds some drama or not, although he says he has matured), Brendan Harris, Jason Pridie

What you think? Is this a “Fair Trade?”

Who is next on the chopping block? Santana? Nathan?Anyone else finding the idea of the new Stadium a little bitter in the mouth?

In conclusion…
Yes, I will continue to watch baseball. Yes, I will continue to go to Twins game. However, I will be watching the front office very closely and thinking of creative new nicknames. Oh, and the office Ass Clown? Well, today we bonded over bitching. I guess one good thing came out of this.


Video Advent Calendar – 26 Days until Christmas
In honor of my shitty baseball mood I chose a song that has swear words in it and you all know how much I love songs with swearing.

Damien Rice – Rootless Tree

I dreamed of Moses / He wanted to put my hair into corn rolls

I said I thought you were born way before they came into fashion./He said don’t be silly/your dreams never follow the chronology of history/and the purpose of dreaming is still quite a mystery/even to me.
Ezra Furman – I dreamed of Moses

With the Winter Meetings gearing up there are so many rumors floating around (the main one about Santana and the Yankees.) I for one will be obsessively checking for updates during the Meetings in hopes of getting good news (and good news only, damnit.)
So, what’s new in Baseball Land? Well a whole lotta nothing. Sheesh, booooring. Here are very obscure baseball related items:
* TBL graciously fed my need for Criminal Minds and caught me up on last week’s episode so I am ready for tonight!
* Lucy is being trained to answer “What’s your favorite sport?” question with “Baseball.” Duh.
* I have marked the MLB shopping catalog with Christmas ideas, for me.
* Oh, Jon Heyman (from Sports Illustrated) kind of pisses me off.
* Cincinnati Reds are poised for a breakout in 2008. Hmm…
* The office Ass Clown is about this <…> far away from getting my brushed-leather-with-wedge-heel boot upside his head (as if I could get my leg that high.)

Video Advent Calendar
28 Days until Christmas

Ezra Furman – Kirsten Dunst

Video Advent Calendar - come on in and take your mind off the rumors

I know! I have been a bad baseball blogger. Sheesh, get off my back.

Well, the only news that is hot right now revolves around the Santana trade rumors. I have heard from multiple fans that if he gets traded they will be pissed (I concur.) However, my co-worker (fondly referred to as Ass Clown) stated that he will stop watching baseball if he goes to the Yankees. Well, I may not feel THAT strongly but I get where he’s coming from.

So, in keeping with the non-baseball but mucho holiday theme…

Virtual Advent Calendar
As a child (and maybe even more as an adult) I loved/love the idea of the Advent calendar to count down until Christmas. Now, in this day and age Christmas (or your preferred December holiday) starts earlier and earlier. If you want the whole “what does Advent really mean” spiel you can check out the definition at Wikipedia.

Henceforth, I present you with my Video Advent Calendar where you can count down the days to Christmas (also fondly know as the day of drinking to cope.)

29 Days until Christmas

Geof from Ace of Cakes singing (my latest television crush) – this one isn’t Christmassy

I asked the Turkey Fairy to keep Santana and sign a 3rd baseman

*gag* A-Rod wins third AL MVP in a landslide *cough* Really? A landslide? Eh.

Trading Floor
First Twins trade of the season goes to….
Signing Craig Monroe from the Cubs - Okay, it appears the Front Office is taking this a little more seriously. Now, if we can only stop signing 13 year olds and get a few more “now” players. I know, I know…we pride ourselves on getting early talent but we need a few more players (Third Base, DH) to solidify our 2008 season.

Around the Leagues
Angels get Garland (mmm…he’s dishy) and send Cabrera to Bitch Sox.
Our little Castillo signs with Mets for four years.

What I am thankful for…2007
Yes, whilst most of you are thankful for your families, good health, steady income and love - I, on the other hand, am thankful for much more shallow things.

· The Ghetto #5 bus, it gets me to work everyday and makes me thankful for my lifestyle choices
· My Minnesota Twins birthday party
· Coffee
· Rossi’s 2-4-1 happy hour
· Seeing my first Travis concert with Liat
· Brit Rockers (The Feeling, Fratellis, the Kooks, Bowie, Queen, Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, the Kinks, the Animals, the Who, Pink Floyd, Sex Pistols, the Clash, Travis)
· Monday Night Happy Hour(s)
· Dim Sum (Shoot ‘em up Jun Bo)
· Ogling the guys outside my office window (Smoking Smoker)
· 89.3 The Current radio station
· Red Dye#5 – the champagne of artificial flavors
· Chocolate cupcakes with white frosting
· Office gossip – or I like to say “networking”
· Minnesota Twins 2007 Baseball Season (We may have not made it to the playoffs but you still have my heart and time April through October.)
· Lucy’s great taste in music (Jimmy Buffet, Bon Jovi, Plain White Tees and classic rock)
· The final Harry Potter book
· Prince’s big concert trifecta in Minneapolis
· Amy (nerdy sci-fi shows, baseball and plasma television)
· My Minnesota Twins Baseball Blog: http://lipglossbaseball.blogspot.com/
· Classic Rock
· My time on the cruise ship
· Al Franken running for Senate
· Celebrating my second blogging anniversary on March 10, 2007
· Baseball
· Ace of Cakes on the Foodnetwork channel, especially Geoffrey)
· Soylent Green
· My AC/DC and Led Zeppelin t-shirts
· Road tripping through Elvis-land (Tennessee, Mississippi, Alabama) with Foley
· The Shot Spotter (detects gunshots)
· This weird obsession with Scott Weiland of Velvet Revolver.
· BBC America television channel
· Consuming alcohol

Superior, they said, never gives up her dead/When the gales of November come early!

The Santana Show
I was very happy to see that FSN North has started showing the 2007 classics games again. Last night was one of the best games from last year. June 18, 2007 with the Twins at the New York Mets. Santana was on the mound and pitched a shut-out game. He also was offensively on fire with hitting a double. The other memororable moment was because this game was when Santana and Circle Me Bert Bylevin had the bet going on. I know you all know what I am talking about…Santana shaved Bert’s head and we had to hear about it for weeks (hell, months) afterwards.
In case Bill Smith (the ambiguous GM) needs a reminder why Santana has to be on our team next year (besides the fact it would be embarrassing to face anyone after letting him go) this is a prime example.
And that transitions nicely into my heart attack of the morning…
Damn you Sports Illustrated and damn you Jon Heyman. Reading this article actually made me nervous. The past few months I have been repeating the manta in my head “They won’t trade Santana, they won’t trade Santana, they won’t trade Santana.” Then you go and write this…
GMs await their chance to deal for a bona fide ace

Son of a ____

Non Baseball and Randomly Random
The 32nd Anniversary of the sinking of the Edmund Fitzgerald is this weekend. I am sad to report that the only knowledge of this event was given to me by the popular song by Gordon Lightfoot. Anyone who has driven the Scenic Northshore Drive from Duluth to Grand Portage will find the references in this song. My particular favorite? The Stores of Gitche Gumee.

When suppertime came, the old cook came on deck sayin
Fellas, its too rough to feed ya
At seven p.m. a main hatchway caved in, he said
Fellas, its been good tknow ya
The captain wired in he had water comin in
And the good ship and crew was in peril
And later that night when his lights went outta sight
Came the wreck of the edmund fitzgerald.
Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald – Gordon Lightfoot

I’ve been through a desert on a horse with no name / It felt good to be out of the rain

Well, it is very quiet in regard to real baseball news. All the rest is off season injuries and possible trades (some of them very far fetching and disheartening…A-Rod to Mets for example) and free-agents (Silva, Lohse and Hernandez declared by starters on the market.)

Real baseball news:
* Francisco “F-Bomb” Liriano is done with rehab and getting ready for Spring Training. Twins fans breathe sigh of relief.

* Torii Hunter won his seventh consecutive Gold Glove award and Santana rightfully got his first.

Non-baseball:
Next week I will be venturing to Vegas with my Aunt K, Stacy and Lucy (who has to be the smartest damn kid in the world) for a week of Sin City. Now, before you start thinking “How fun can it be in Vegas with a toddler” let me just explain we’ll be road tripping outside of the strip and into the desert. You heard it here first folks…this city girl will be at the mercy of the desert. Anyone else have America’s “Horse with No Name” song stuck in their head? Anyways, if you don’t hear from me in two weeks I am probably stranded in the desert trying to ration the hidden bottles of water and power bars I snuck in the trunk. Think Lord of the Flies but with less wild pig hunting.
Ralph: Someone has to stay behind. Piggy…
Jack: [interrupts] Sure, protect Piggy like you always do.
Ralph: Don’t be stupid. What can he do with just one eye?

Creepy…

Bad boys, bad boys/Watcha gonna do, watcha gonna do/when they come for you

Baseballness
Well, it is sure quiet around the World of the Minnesota Twins. The big talk is the new stadium and gossip over what will happen with trades.

There is some positive news about two minor league players that we saw in the big leagues in 2007:
Our Minor Leaguers
Buscher (third base) named 2007 Sherry Robertson Award as the Twins’ Minor League Player of the Year.
Kevin Slowey selected as 2007 Jim Rantz Award as Twins’ Minor League Pitcher of the Year.

Everywhere I look this is what I have to read:
Joe Girardi formally announced as the new Yankees manager.
Torre finally announced as the Dodgers new manager.

Non-baseball
I went to this play the other night that was very intense and really interesting, Cherry Docs (http://www.mnjewishtheatre.org/shows.html). Yes, the play was great but the best part of the evening was riding around in the mock-undercover cop car. I felt like Starsky, Hutch, Cagney, Lacey, Kojak or T.J. Hooker. There was the glass partition that divided the front and back seats with the sliding window thing, a computer system and a C.B. radio. It was sweet!!! I don’t think I have ever felt as badass as I did riding shotgun. The only down side was when my safety-nerd popped up saying that if we were in a collision the airbag would jam the computer system into my chest. Hey, it was a risk I was willing to take. I only wish I would have thought about sitting in the back for effect.

‘Tis the season
Have you ordered your holiday cards yet? Well, you should! I am pimping my girl, Pumpkingirl’s http://www.pumpkin-girl.blogspot.com/ new holiday cards she had for sale on Etsy: http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=2023
Pirate Christmas cards? Hell ya!