Like a rhinestone cowboy / Riding out on a horse in a star-spangled rodeo

The title is in continuance of getting catchy songs stuck in peoples head.

Well, yesterday’s day game was sad/painful/depressing/frustrating. All of those words seem to be commonly used as descriptions this last series against Grady’s Ladies (Cleveland for those who don’t know about my mocking of Grady Sizemore's fan club.)

It appears as if everyone has given up in the clubhouse. Maybe it is time to shake things up and make these last three weeks of baseball fun, fun for the players and fun for the fans. I really am looking forward to these games. I know that once the final out happens at the bottom of the 9th on September 30 in Boston it will be all over for the Twins until February of next year when players start reporting to Spring Training. Yeah, I know that the four months that my world is without baseball is really a short period of time in the grand scheme of life. However, there is no baseball. Nothing to watch whilst drinking beer or crocheting. Nothing to distract me during Monday Night Happy hours. Nothing to make me obsessively check my cell for score updates when I am not by a television. Nothing to doze on the sofa on a Sunday afternoon. No Dollar Dog Night, no Circle me Bert, no Twingo, no Full Count, no late nights at the Dome, no bleary eyed morning afters. Nothing.

Well, I hate to leave you on that depressing note but hey, thems the apples.

You take the good, you take the bad / You take them both and there you have

Here is the new deck at the house. This is where I sat drinking a beer and listening to the games.

Before you all panic and start threatening me (uh, Curlz?) I have not gone over to the dark side, to football. Not even in baseball’s off season. (I don’t like my sports to overlap.) I will enjoy hockey and curling during the snowy months.

And on to the point of this blog…baseball.
To quote the lyrics to a well known television series that struck home with many viewers “You take the good, you take the bad / you take them both and there you have / The Facts of Life, the Facts of Life."
The same can be said about baseball, specifically the MN Twins.

Here we are into our last month of baseball. Last year at this time there was an air of nervous energy. We were fighting for our spot in postseason, toiling for the Wildcard race. In the end, due to some very erratic circumstances we secured our spot as American League Central Champs. (I get goose bumps thinking about that game, you know “that” one.) In the present moment I find myself just wanting to enjoy the remaining games that we have in September.

The results are in…
Friday, Aug 31 - L 4-9, W 5-0
Saturday, Sept 1 - W 6-4
Sunday, Sept 2 - L 1-8
Monday, Sept 3 - L 0-5
Tuesday, Sept 4 - L 5-7 (in painful extra innings)

Last night's game was a heartbreaker, an old fashioned up and down game of baseball. I think Dick & Bert cursed it when in the 6th Inning they were talking about Guerrier and how tonight Slowey would get the Win and/or Nathan would get the Save (that Guerrier knows his role and it isn’t to get Wins or Saves.) Then it goes in to the 9th with Nathan at the mound. A homerun tied the game. I tried but I couldn’t watch past the 10th. This morning I woke up to catch the 11th being replayed on FSN. I watched as DePaula had the bases loaded and the inning ended with Cleveland pulling ahead with 7 runs. Ouch. I guess it is time to shake off the dust and go in to the day game today and play again. (By the way, I was offered suite tickets again but due to Amy not having PTO to use for a half day and me not wanting to go with anyone else we aren’t going.)

Aren’t you impressed that I can write a lot and really not “say” anything?

What will my baseball muse do in the off season?

My baseball muse is gone. Where has she gone? Maybe I need to get to another game to find her. Mmm…beer and peanuts. I think I am all done with sitting in the cheap seats (GA) on Dollar Dog Night (also Half Price Student Night) because it is not fun. Don’t get me wrong; I “heart” the Dollar Dogs but I also “heart” not having to deal with sugar-hyped teenagers and cranky ushers.

Moooooving on
Baker rocked the free world yesterday! What a game. Now the other fans must realize how frustrating it is to lose by one run. How obnoxious it is when their offense can’t stay on base. We won on Saturday too even though Garza couldn’t hang in there. Unfortunately we couldn’t stay in there on Friday and get Santana a much needed win.

Let’s take an inventory
Castillo – Gone but to a good home with the Mets
Cirillo – Gone to AZ but not really going to do anything down there
Leeew Ford – Gone to minors
Did we get anything? Uh no, we did call up another minor league pitcher. Oh, good. I was worried we would try to get some big bats into our line-up. Whew, wouldn’t want to be mistaken with that. Note: today’s sarcasm is brought to you by the letter M, the number 7 and Pohlad’s stinginess.

In conclusion
To all you “They are out of it now.” “There is no way they can catch up.” “Guess they gave up on the season” fans (um, Geoff and company) I would like to say…4.5 games back. Do you still think we have cashed it in? (Yeah, to some of your points it doesn’t help that if we get to post-season and don’t have any necessary changes to our team it is going to be tough.)

Right, let’s clean up the Indians tonight and win the series. I will be on a barstool at Rossi’s pretending to listen to my friends chat whilst drinking wine and watching the game.

I have a special power...I can relate everything in my life today (and today only) to CSI: NY

Since I am on an obsessive compulsive kick regarding the FANTASTIC Season Finale of CSI: New York and I am still saddened by the Cleveland Indians sweeping the Twins (boo) I thought wouldn’t use any brain cells and write this…

If baseball was like CSI: NY

The drama and suspense that happens in the first eight innings would be resolved in a tidy packed in the ninth.

There would be more fighting!

The Twins would win (?)

I would download the games to my iPod to watch the best parts over and over again (yeah…kind of sad, I know.)

Beer would be cheaper!

I wouldn’t mute it and make up my own dialog.

Nicer clothes.

Kevlar.

Twins would kick ass!

And I hung my head and cried - sticking with the lyric theme (taken from You Are My Sunshine)

“I've come to the conclusion that the two most important things in life are good friends and a good bullpen.” ~Bob Lemon, 1981

Yeah…looks like the Twins need one of the above.

Don’t even get me started on the game.

There I was bragging and strutting around like a proud peacock about the Minnesota Twins. Look at them! Aren’t they rockstars? Take that you critics!

Well, color me a dumbass. Guess I have egg on my face now.

Last night was brutal. So brutal in fact I not only hung my head in shame whilst muttering a few swear words under my breath so Lucy wouldn’t hear, I also shook my fist at the television and walked away.

I walked away – just like the lyrics from the Ben Harper song:

And its so hard to do
And so easy to say
But sometimes
Sometimes you just have to walk away
Walk away
And head for the door

Final results: Twins lose 7 to 15 against the Cleveland Indians.

So, focusing on good news…I am totally rocking the viewership on my self-promoting, randomly unstable, mildly interesting Lipgloss & Baseball blog, point proven by checking out my counter on the right side. I have had 445 hits since April when I added the counter. Sweet!

Mild Weather and Mild Baseball

Cleveland 7, Twins 3 in 12 innings

Today I hurt: my head hurts, my heart hurts and my Twins hurts.

12 innings are summarized with…
Hi Ho Silva did averagely okay
One inning of great offense
Barty is struggling for his SS groove
Morneausey is having a bad streak
One grape martini, one blueberry vodka mix, one Philly sushi roll, edamame and three hours of gossip all prevented me from catching the first four innings
Jesse Crain (or Crainadian by Pulling a Blyleven) did not do so well (understatement of the year?)
When Torii hit his homerun they played the StarWars theme song.

RedSox Swept Yankees? Hey Chicken Little, is the sky falling?

Is it bad that I laugh at the Yankees getting swept by the Red Sox? Is it bad that my two favorite teams are the Twins and whoever is playing the Yankees? Man, I sound like a Packer vs. Vikings football fan. Yikes! It is not that I hate the Yankees, they just make me mental!

In Twins news: The only non-televised game this weekend ended up being the only one we won. D’oh! Friday was painful, Saturday sounded funny and Sunday was poor. Come on boys!!! Don’t make me break out my lucky charms again *insert squeaky Irish accent saying “Ye can’t get me lucky charms!”* Oh, I know Amy is beating her head right now and that makes me giggle.

Tonight the Twins are back in against the Indians! Watch out for some girls wearing pink shirts that call themselves “Grady’s Ladies.” Eek! I guess it is no worse than the girls here wearing pink Joe “Baby Jesus” Mauer jerseys.
Oh and Hi Ho Silva is pitching. Let’s sit back and judge!