Twins 11, Seattle 2 - Felt secure enough to go to bed early

Ah, life vest! You make me feel so secure. Kind of like Ortiz in our pitching line up. Oh, if only Silva could obtain that status.

Minnesota Twins 11, Seattle 2

Damn you West Coast for having the game start at 9:00 p.m. This girl can’t stay awake until midnight! Especially when I wake up at 5:45 a.m. Argh! Another bad side effect…It is too late to call Amy with random baseball talk.

You know, it was a good thing that Stacy was sitting in the dining room last night. She may have not have been paying attention to me but if she wasn’t there I would have looked like a crazy person talking to myself. Well, crazier than normal.

If you were quietly observing me in the corner here are a few things you may have overheard me say whilst watching the Baseball game…

Oh good! They have Bartlett back in
Hey! Baby Jesus is going to be 25 on Thursday, man I am old
We are on fire!
Uh oh, Bert already said something wrong. I think Dick just gently corrected his blooper about a triple versus a double
The pirantas are back? When did they leave? Hey, I saw piranhas in the Bahamas. Not that I saw them outside of a glass box aquarium or anything
Dude, 7 to 1? I guess I can go to bed early!
Whoa! The Wild are up 4 to 1. That is going to be a good game. I bet Gregg is really hung over tomorrow.
Stacy! Come look! There is a big fight on the ice. So, this Anaheim guy hit the Wild guy but it was a bad, unsportsmanlike like hit. Look! Did you see that?
What? They are walking Morneausey to load the bases. I hate when they do that. I feel bad for the next player up. It is like he is the last picked for dodge ball. Come on Hunter!!!
Holy Shit! Hunter just hit a homerun! *insert evil laughter* I guess that will teach the Mariners to think it would be better to face Hunter than Morneausey. Mmmwwwahahaaha
Oh, one of the Wild players is on the ice “taking a lap”. The announcer just said that he felt bad for the Refs in Anaheim who inherit the fight issue. Man, I gotta watch that on Thursday. Come on Wild!!!No Stacy, don’t worry. I won’t be double-timing between hockey and baseball. I won’t cheat on baseball that way.
Uh, it is almost 11:00, I am going to bed.

Sailing the Seas and Missing Baseball

I have been removed from baseball and the MN Twins the last four days due to my brief stint on a cruise ship. Here are the stats from the three games:
Tampa Bay Run
Thursday 4/12: Twins 3, TB 2 – Win
Friday 4/13: Twins 2, TB 4 – Loss
Saturday 4/14: Twins 12, TB 5 – Win
Sunday 4/15: Twins 4, TB 6 – Loss

Next run is at Seattle! Sheesh, I don’t know if I can make it through an entire 9:00 p.m. CT start time but I will try!

In the case of my untimely demise...

Real news
Reported at Sports Illustrated.com (evidently they do other stuff besides the Swimsuit Edition):
Mark Pieper, the agent for first baseman Justin Morneau, has turned down a deal similar to Joe Mauer's. For now, Morneau will be paid $4.5 million for this season, a deal he agreed to earlier this month. Because of a difference in service time, Morneau can't become a free agent until after the 2010 season while Mauer could have become free a year earlier.

I know my opinion doesn’t really matter but I think we need to lock this kid in! I know Amy is down in AZ nodding her head in agreement. I don’t want the Twins to look like the chumps who let the MVP get away. Lock him in!!!

Not so important news
The next few months will be busy with putting myself into possibly dangerous situations so I want to make sure my bases are covered, pun intended. This week I will be venturing to the Mille Lacs Kathio State Park where there is a chance I could be mauled by deer, lost on a nature hike or die from hypothermia. In March I will be participating in more extreme happy hours than a normal human being. Finally, in April I will be going on a cruise to the Bahamas’. I have been reading up on the stats with cruises and the odds may be low of the ship going down but they are high with me falling (or get pushed) overboard or getting some weird flu. So, being the ever organized Obsessive Compulsive (OCS) person that I am I have written by Baseball Will.

In the case of my untimely demise I leave…

To Lucille Eskedar Anderson I leave my autographed Tony Oliva baseball and Giant Foam Finger. I know that Amy gave me the giant foam finger but I think Lucy (and Stacy) would benefit from the joy it can bring during a game. Also, Amy isn’t really the Rah-Rah Look at my Giant Foam Finger kind of person.

To Stacy K. Anderson I leave my Twins Piranha’s t-shirt. I hope that when she wears it she will tell the story of Bert Blyleven calling them the Pirantah’s. However, before she can take possession of the article she will need to answer a few quiz-like questions to be deemed worthy: 1.) What does the name “The Piranha’s” mean? 2.) Who are the Piranha’s? 3.) Who coined that name?

To Amy Wood I leave my two American League Champions (2002, 2006), Santana and Punto t-shirts, Twins hooded sweatshirt, blue Twins visor and white Twins visor. I am also leaving her this blog in hopes she will carry on the insanity of baseball.

To Heather “Feather” Foley I leave my 33 for MVP t-shirt since I know Amy won’t wear it anyways.

To my cousin Jason Anderson I leave my Baltimore Orioles visor, he understands.

To my mom I leave my 2007 MN Twins calendar so she can look fondly on my notes and handwriting and remember me at my best.

To Morgan Schneider I leave the MN Twins outfit (size 12 months) that I gave Lucy for her first Twins game.

Any additional items that I may have missed I give to EBay and hope of the selling of said items I can have some cheap bastard use the money to put flowers on my grave.

Morbid but true.