Tuesday, February 13, 2007

In the case of my untimely demise...

Real news
Reported at Sports Illustrated.com (evidently they do other stuff besides the Swimsuit Edition):
Mark Pieper, the agent for first baseman Justin Morneau, has turned down a deal similar to Joe Mauer's. For now, Morneau will be paid $4.5 million for this season, a deal he agreed to earlier this month. Because of a difference in service time, Morneau can't become a free agent until after the 2010 season while Mauer could have become free a year earlier.

I know my opinion doesn’t really matter but I think we need to lock this kid in! I know Amy is down in AZ nodding her head in agreement. I don’t want the Twins to look like the chumps who let the MVP get away. Lock him in!!!

Not so important news
The next few months will be busy with putting myself into possibly dangerous situations so I want to make sure my bases are covered, pun intended. This week I will be venturing to the Mille Lacs Kathio State Park where there is a chance I could be mauled by deer, lost on a nature hike or die from hypothermia. In March I will be participating in more extreme happy hours than a normal human being. Finally, in April I will be going on a cruise to the Bahamas’. I have been reading up on the stats with cruises and the odds may be low of the ship going down but they are high with me falling (or get pushed) overboard or getting some weird flu. So, being the ever organized Obsessive Compulsive (OCS) person that I am I have written by Baseball Will.


In the case of my untimely demise I leave…

To Lucille Eskedar Anderson I leave my autographed Tony Oliva baseball and Giant Foam Finger. I know that Amy gave me the giant foam finger but I think Lucy (and Stacy) would benefit from the joy it can bring during a game. Also, Amy isn’t really the Rah-Rah Look at my Giant Foam Finger kind of person.

To Stacy K. Anderson I leave my Twins Piranha’s t-shirt. I hope that when she wears it she will tell the story of Bert Blyleven calling them the Pirantah’s. However, before she can take possession of the article she will need to answer a few quiz-like questions to be deemed worthy: 1.) What does the name “The Piranha’s” mean? 2.) Who are the Piranha’s? 3.) Who coined that name?

To Amy Wood I leave my two American League Champions (2002, 2006), Santana and Punto t-shirts, Twins hooded sweatshirt, blue Twins visor and white Twins visor. I am also leaving her this blog in hopes she will carry on the insanity of baseball.

To Heather “Feather” Foley I leave my 33 for MVP t-shirt since I know Amy won’t wear it anyways.

To my cousin Jason Anderson I leave my Baltimore Orioles visor, he understands.

To my mom I leave my 2007 MN Twins calendar so she can look fondly on my notes and handwriting and remember me at my best.

To Morgan Schneider I leave the MN Twins outfit (size 12 months) that I gave Lucy for her first Twins game.

Any additional items that I may have missed I give to EBay and hope of the selling of said items I can have some cheap bastard use the money to put flowers on my grave.

Morbid but true.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my GOD!!!!! You are giving Feather the 33 for MVP shirt!! I would most definitely wear it...every day in fact. We are no longer BFFs!!!! And yes a girl can change her mind;-)

Baseball_Lipgloss said...

Girl, I can not keep up with your baseball moods! If you promise to wear the 33 for MVP t-shirt you can have it. I will give feather a plain white t-shirt with "Dave Winfield" written on the back in marker. We all know how she is old school!!
Where were you today? I missed you online!

Anonymous said...

Working. A girl gots to make a living. Seriously I had a really busy day.

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