Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Now, I’ve heard there was a secret chord/That David played and it pleased the Lord/But you don’t really care for music do you?

Ah, Those Girls (well, one of them) is currently in Flo-rida to celebrate the kick-off of the Minnesota Twins 2009 Baseball season. I am anxiously following her Twitter to keep updated on all the happenings (and gossip.) No pressure girl!

Ticket Info
Well, single game tickets go on sale at noon on Saturday, March 7. Alas, I will not be able to man the phone and computer to score tickets for my usual Home Opener Posse. I will be heading to Duluth, MN in my Jeep with a 12-year old going to see David freaking Archuleta (runner-up to last year’s American Idol.) Yeah…go ahead, bring on the mocking!

Bad News Bears…er, Twins
Bonsor needs surgery

Don’t forget, I Twitter!

You can check out my twitter here:
If I find that I do a lot of baseball Twittering at games I will create a new baseball-centric one. We’ll see how the first few weeks go. I am sure my “normal” Twitter people won’t want to read:

Dome Dog!
Beer me, Wally the Beer Man!
Where’s Marnie?
TWINGO was his name-o
Everyone loves Joe Mauer, he’s the hometown hero

Non-baseball but no less important

Randomly Random
*I saw a handful of people walking around with ash crosses on their foreheads. My natural instinct is to tap their arms and tell them they have a little schmutz on their face. My other instinct is to hiss and cover my eyes. I am trying to avoid both of those reactions.

*Zeppelin The Dog is going to puppy training classes at this frou-frou pet store in a bourgeois neighborhood. I need to make sure Zeppelin The Dog gets his AC/DC collar before the first class so we can rock it hardcore style! No fancy frills for us! We are representin’ SOUTHSIIIIIIDE. (Throws up my gang sign.)

*Spring Training (baseball for those who don’t know) starts tonight for the Minnesota Twins. First pitch at 6:05 p.m. against Boston. Baseball fever is HERE!

*I booked the hotel room in Duluth, MN (for when I take Olivia to see David Archuleta) and it is right next to the tattoo place that K-spra got hers at (during our drunken revelry.) Hmm…I wonder if it would be too “After School Special” if I brought Olivia there to learn about the perils of tattoos whilst I get one.

Self-Reminder: Upcoming Events
2/27 – EV’s half birthday (yeah, he celebrates half birthdays)
2/27 – Joel McHale
3/3 – Fleetwood Mac
3/7 – David Archuleta *sigh*
3/17 – Epic St. Paddy’s Day Celebration
3/24 – Katy Perry
3/28 – Co-workers band
4/17 – Travis
4/27 – Sushi class with mom
5/1 – My 30th Birthday (Oh, Lord love a duck)

Music of the Day – Leonard Cohen Edition
I know that everyone loves Jeff Buckley’s rendition of “Hallelujah” but my favorite is the original by Leonard Cohen. His raspy (whiskey and cigarette) voice really strikes a chord on the song. Damien Rice also does a good version.

Thanks to Hassertime I have a working link if you want to check out Leonard Cohen. I mean, you obviously do.

Leonard Cohen – Hallelujah

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Night is falling everywhere/Rockets hit the fun fair/Satan loves the bomb-scare but he won’t scare you

New Twin - Crede
I got a text late last night (okay, it was 10:30 p.m. BUT that’s late when you start drinking at 4:00 p.m.) from one of Those Girls saying that the Twins signed Crede. Wow, we did one thing this offseason. Welcome to Minnesota Mr. Crede. We are a loyal but fickle bunch of fans. I already predict his little banner will say something like Crede’s Crew and that will make me roll my eyes. In the words of the Ramones (This business is killing me) “You can’t please all the people all the time.”

Non-baseball but no less important

Kat Von D is my new Girl-Crush

*On Wednesday I stood in line amongst the tattooed and pierced coolness of Minneapolis to have my brand spanking new Kat Von D book autographed. (In case you don’t know who she is: she’s a tattoo artist, has the show L.A. Ink, and is dating Nikki Sixx.
*Nothing like being the ONLY person in a line (of hundreds) wearing dress pants and a suitcoat. Hey, I had to skip out on a meeting to go wait in line.
*I had a crossdresser behind me who spoke on her phone the whole time about make-up and jerky boyfriends. I had a guy in front of me that had those earlobe gauge peircings (the big plugs in his ears) that were so big (that’swhatshesaid) that I wanted to ask if I could put my finger through it. Don’t know why.
*Kat Von D and I had a brief conversation that went like this:
Kat: Hey, are you on your lunch break?
Me: No but I am skipping a meeting
Kat: Oh, is it an important one?
Me: *giggle* Haaa…um? *giggle*
Kat: Just tell me it was important so I feel cool
Me (gushing): Yes, it was very important *giggle*
Kat: Thanks for stopping by. It was nice meeting you.
Me: *giggle* Yeah, nice meeting YOU! Thank you!

*Yep, I fangirled pretty damn hard. I didn’t expect the nervous giggles to hit me but I think I pulled it off.

Dr. Feelgood
I rocked to Motley Crue on Wednesday night and THEY WERE AWESOME! My review of that concert can best be summed up via my Twitters:

*All the opening bands are done. AC/DC’s Hells Bells playing whilst we wait for Motley Crue.

*Motley Crue wants you to shout shout shout shout at the devil. Are you? I am.
*Beer run whilst guitar solo intro.
*Motley Crue and Elvis. Covering Jailhouse Rock.
*Tommy Lee’s dad was born in St. Paul, MN.
*According to Motley Crue, I am the mother fucker of the year. Huh.
*Don’t go away mad, just go away – per the Crue.
*Motley Crue: same old situation, same old ball and chain + a fight! Love it!
*Motley Crue wants us to scream, shout, tear up this fucking town. Sorry Mom.
*BTW, that’s Primal Scream!
*Motley Crue thinks that YOU (me) got the looks that kill. Mmm…beer good.
*He’s the one you call Dr. Feelgood. He’s the one that makes it alright. You know what? He does!
*I am on my way Home Sweet Home…well, after this song. Good Night Motley Crue!

Zeppelin The Dog Update
Zepp is 4 months old now!

Music of the Day – New Release Edition
U2 – Get Your Boots On

Monday, February 16, 2009

He’s the one they call Dr. Feelgood/He’s the one that makes ya all right/He’s the one called Dr. Feelgood

Spring Training is upon us

Morneasuey is everywhere!
I was surfing the net the other day and this ad popped up.

Non-baseball but no less important

First time commenter, long time swearer

The first time EV comments on my blog here it is to call me a lazyass. Thanks EV, love ya too! :)

Zeppelin The Dog

So, Zeppelin “Don’t Sing Me No Stairway to Heaven” The Dog has been with us for a few days now. He’s so chill that I worry he is storing it up to go loco on us later. Nah, he’s too damn cute for that. Hey, you want to read a totally lame-oh recap of Life With Dog?
* Zepp is so rockstar that he hurled in the car just to get rid of the spins (hey, it helps to vom after drinking so much you get the spins)
* I think he likes Motley Crue more than Led Zeppelin. I was standing outside with him yesterday singing “Dr Feelgood” and he really got into it
* I have publicly declared that no t-shirts or clothing-like accessories for Zepp. He has a lot of Street-cred to earn and an “I still live with my parents” t-shirt won’t help. Scarves will be accepted for special occasions
* Black Dog by Led Zeppelin may be cliché but it does fit the best out of all the songs

It had to be done
Since ya’ll are so sick of me fangirling over David Cook I give thee…
Ten Things I Like Better Than David Cook
1. Vodka
2. Frosting
3. Naps
4. Mocking people
5. Happy Hours (notice I made that plural)
6. Black nail polish
7. Getting concert tickets in the mail and holding them close to my heart
8. Lucy singing something ridiculously inappropriate for a 3-year old (Janis Joplin, AC/DC, Steve Miller Band, Katy Perry)
9. Baseball
10. Nyquil

Music of the Day – Gonna see them in concert Edition

Motley Crue – Dr. Feelgood

Thursday, February 12, 2009

I am counting on you Lord please don’t let me down/Prove that you love me and buy the next round

I am an epic fail at baseball blogging this past week. I have a legitimate reason though!!!

1. American Idol Hollywood Week (I am claiming Adam Lambert in the American Idol Drinking Game)
2. I found out the David Archuleta concert I am going to is sold out and I couldn’t stop crying tears of confused shame
3. I got a new puppy! His name is Zeppelin and he’s 13-weeks old.
4. A-Rods very heartfelt and emotional apology made me throw-up in my mouth. (zzzzing!)
5. I am trying to teach Lucy all the words to Janis Joplin’s “Mercedes Benz”
6. I went to the Motocross

Hey Lady Bloggers
(and for the few male ones that care)!
Let’s have an activity! Come on! We talk about it all the time. The other baseball bloggers always write about how they have a luncheon and what-not. Let’s gather together and talk baseball! What say you?

Non-baseball but no less important
I gots a rock & roll puppy

Meet Zeppelin! He’s a 13-week old Siberian Husky/Australian Blue Heeler mix. He’s about 27 lbs and was rescued from the Humane Society. He’s fucking adorable, even at 6:30 a.m. when I was standing outside with him in my pajamas telling him to “go potty!”

#2 – David Archuleta concert? WTF Jen?
Wait, you didn’t know that I have tickets to the David Archuleta (runner-up on American Idol Seasno 7) concert in Duluth, MN? Oh, you haven’t been paying attention. The 12-year old that I took to the American Idol concert last year (I acted like I was too cool to go so I said “fine, I’ll take her” but secretly wanted to go) wanted to go to the David Archuleta concert. Being the kind and generous (drunk, snarky, slightly bitchy) soul that I am I said “Why the hell not!” I bought tickets online thinking they were General Admission and the two of us could hang in the back (near the bar). Alas, I didn’t read clearly and have now found myself in possession of two 8th ROW seats to David Archuleta. I am going to die aren’t I? I am going to be mass murdered by tweens. I am going to be a statistic on the nightly news. Hey, maybe I’ll make wildly inappropriate signs to make my heart feel better.

Other non-soul sucking concerts
2/18 – Motley Crue
2/27 – Joel McHale
3/3 – Fleetwood Mac
3/7 – David Archuleta *sigh*
3/24 – Katy Perry
4/7 – Travis
5/3 – Flight of the Conchords

Elle (elle eh eh) planned a secret outing for us last Saturday night. We ended up at the Motocross Spectacular at the Target Center. The whole idea of flying motorcycles both fascinated me and freaked me out. I kept having scenarios flashing in my brain of motorcycles, helmets or riders flying into the crowd and killing me. I kept saying “I don’t want to die here! I don’t want to be one of those tragic statistics!” Thank baby jesus Elle (elle eh eh) understands my neuroses and declared she would protect me. Once I moved past the irrational fears, I had a blast! There was beer, great people watching, exciting things, cute guys, lots of hairspray, exhaust fumes, tattoos galore and…WALLY THE BEERMAN! Thanks Elle!

Music of the Day – Lucy’s a Rockstar Edition
Here’s Lulu representin’ the 60’s
Mercedes Benz

Monday, February 2, 2009

Pack my bags, walking in the rain/Hear them voices inside my head/Drinking that booze & taking down names

Let’s talk sports
There was a big football game yesterday, huh.
* I like the hype and history around the super bowl but 12 hours of football is kind of long for a newbie like me.
* I tuned in early to mock Al Roker interviewing “celebs” on the red carpet.
* I caught Matt Lauer’s interview with President Obama (I won’t ever get tired of typing that).
* I watched Jennifer Hudson sing the anthem (and got into an argument with my aunt about if it was a pre-recorded track or not).
* I flipped between the game and the Puppy Bowl.
* I chuckled Bruce Springsteen’s sliding crotch shot during the half-time concert.
* I cheered for the Cardinals and Fitzgerald.
* I cheered for the Steelers (since 90% of the blogs I read are Steelers fans.)
* I was super excited for The Office.
* I went to bed.

Big football day huh?

Uh oh, it’s hard to be the Golden Boy
Phelps admits ‘bad judgment’ after marijuana-pipe photo
Wow, the hype around this is kind of shocking. It is like children everywhere are finding out there really isn’t a tooth fairy or something. Come on, kid smoked pot. How many of our past presidents were outed for smoking pot? I am not saying that it’s okay and all that jazz but I am sure there are many other things to be up-in-arms about. (Oh and I understand that he’s a role model and what not BUT if the press didn’t go crazy with printing and disceting this photos would the children even find out? Yeah…probably not.)

Twins Talk
The new commercial for Twins Territory aired during the Super Bowl. I kind of fangirled it. What can I say, these commercials rock my sox.
Trucks” First of reportedly four commercials to air this season

Tickets! Who needs tickets?
Ames and I are proud holders of 2009 Season Tickets (splitting a package.) We’ll be back in our same spot – Section 204, row 4. I look forward to seeing Cosby Sweater Geek, Giant Headphones Guy, Hair Scrunchie Chick, Broken Leg Man (hopefully that has healed up), Chatty McChatterson, and now us girls! Weeeee!

Non-baseball but no less important

Scott Weiland owns my soul!
I saw Scott Weiland in concert on Saturday night. You know Scott Weiland, of Stone Temple Pilots and Velvet Revolver fame. A big thanks to EV for scoring us third row tickets!!! There once was a time when I wasn’t such a seat-whore (that’swhatsehsaid) and didn’t care where I sat but now…now that has all changed! (12th row for American Idol, 5th row for AC/DC, 8th row for David Archuleta, 3rd row for Scott Weiland.)
Where: The concert was held in this small theater which gave a really intimate setting for the show. I was a little drunkenly disappointed to see the place wasn’t very full. I mean, it’s Scott fucking Weiland!?!?!?!
Who: The crowd was a mix of old rocker dudes, young white ‘burban kids, hipsters, retired rock & roll couples and The Cougars. The cougars were a little scary because I have actually never witnessed a pack of cougars in full rock glory before. I tried to refrain from being too catty in front of EV (be thankful.)
Set List: We got to hear Vaseline and Interstate Love Song (in which I fangirled at.) He played a lot of new stuff including his cover of Bowie’s Fame.

Music of the Day
Scott Weiland – Paralysis