I’m spinning in circles I can’t stop/I thought it was over but it’s not/I’m in love/With a fool

Baseball – a la Twins Fest
It looks like I will be attending on Saturday. The stars have aligned right and I get to meet up with another (non baseball) friend that has a booth there. Who else is going to be there on Saturday?

Non-baseball but no less important
Laser Eyes
Just last week the episode of SNL with the Digital Short of “Laser Cats” aired. Now, in my own home I have a slightly modified version of a Laser Cat (singular.)
Notice Lucy and Mo-mo jumping on Lucy’s new trampoline

Boy, don’t those kids look like they are having a good time. They have no worries. Wait! What is that in the lower left corner? Oh no! It is Laser Cat!!!!
Yep, that’s my cat, the one that shoots lasers from her demonic eyes.

Because now this is my “thing” – Music
I know, I know, enough with The Feeling already!
So my super uber fantastically awesome top-ten band, The Feeling just posted some new songs on their Myspace page and well…they are fantastic of course, but I think I am a little judgmental about the awesomeness of their first album (holy shit, did I not just channel the vocabulary of a 14-year old.) So, their first single, I Thought It Was Over (which I posted the video of a few weeks ago) has totally grown on me and I love it. Oh, and they finally launched their new site and it is very cool looking - The Feeling

I tried to be like Grace Kelly/but her looks were too sad/So I tried a little Freddie/I’ve gone identity mad!

Part I - Baseball
To fest or not to fest, that is the question
The Twins fest is fast approaching and I am still debating whether to attend or not. I am not one for autographs or paraphernalia. However, I am one for people watching and making my twins wish list. I think it would only take a small smattering of begging to get Amy to attend with me, so that’s not the issue. Also, there are tons of awesome bloggers that are going to be there. Hmm…I still have time to Pro-Con.

Part II – Damn Cute Kids
Lil’ Lucy is a freaking, tiny replica of a stylish and sassy Olympic swimmer. But hey, don’t take my word for it. Check the photos out. I can’t wait to bring her to Ryan’s pool this summer and let her go crazy (whilst properly watched so she doesn’t drown or anything.)




Part III – Music, of course
Just put a few new songs on my iPod
Grace Kelly – Mika
One (U2 cover) – Johnny Cash
Phantom Limb – The Shins
Okay, what rock have I been under that I didn’t realize the awesomeness that is The Shins? These guys are fantastic!

Yours truly (that would be me) is securing a hot date with this man…

Yep, you may have guessed it, Tom-fucking-Jones!!!
Jealous? Well, you should be.

In a coffee shop in a city/which is every coffee shop/in every city/on a day which is every day

I may be taking the leap
I have received a very tempting offer to go in on a 20-game pack for Twins season tickets. I am thinking about it but I am a little leery of such a commitment. This, coming from a gal who goes to about 40 games a year, I know. There are people out there telling me not to do it, especially with all these new players. I think it would be a great time to commit to the Twins. All I have to do it make the decision in my head and then talk Amy into joining me.

Since baseball is in hibernation let’s talk music!
Concerts I am interested in attending
The Hives @ First Ave – February 28
Mika @ First Ave – February 6
The New York Dolls @ Fine Line – February 24
TNT (AC/DC tribute band) @ sketchy sports bar – January 26

Concerts I am attending
Foo Fighters @ Target Center – February 27
Romantica, Alarmist @ First Ave – January 15
I really want to bring Lucy to see that band we caught at the Midtown Global Market. They are playing at a coffee shop later this month.

Podcasts – once to start you can’t stop
Seriously, I am addicted to finding new podcasts. My local NPR affiliate, MPR (Minnesota Public Radio) has a rock station called 89.3 The Current (sorry, lots of back story there.) Anyways, they have a new podcast called Facemelter! Here is the description:
The Current is proud to launch its newest podcast Facemelter. Every week, Facemelter hosts Jill Riley and Brett Baldwin talk about the guitar solos that are so awesome, they melt your face.
You can check it out here: Facemelter

Our own not-so-Little Plastic Castle
Great, now I just put a song in my own head – Little Plastic Castles by Ani Difranco
Once upon a time in a castle, in our living room there lived a damn cute little girl…

You aren’t seeing things. There is a castle in the middle of the living room. The strange thing is it’s not that obtrusive. I can put my feet on the ledge, cram myself inside for a moment of peace and it really warms the place up.

I’ll be alright on my own/Don’t worry about me/Pack your bags, your alibis/And do whatever’s gonna set you free

Girl’s night
Stacy sublet Lucy to my aunt and uncle last night so we had a good old fashioned Girls Night. We saw Juno, ate Thai food (Tum Rup Thai) and went music shopping at Cheapo’s. We also (which may embarrass Stacy for stating this publicly) watched the fifth disc of the sixth season of Gilmore Girls. I spent the whole evening comment on how I was freaked out/excited that Stacy was actually sitting down and chilling with me. (Being a single parent with an exuberant blog community keeps her going.)

Juno, the film
Honestly, there are very few films out there that whilst I am watching them I covet the soundtrack. Juno is one of them (the other being Elizabethtown.) First, the film was amazing. Hands down one of the most entertaining and funny films of the year, if not more. Second, the soundtrack is absolutely amazing. Seriously, check it out.

Music, the addiction
Being inspired by the soundtrack of Juno and being conveniently located across the street from the city’s greatest used music store, Cheapo’s. Well, since I have no willpower and/or control AND they have the greatest Modern Rock collection I left with four CDs:
Neon Bible by Arcade Fire (yes, I finally broke down and bought it, damn hype)
America by Romantica (I decided to give back to one of the local bands)
Scottish Fiction by Idlewild (I thought I would give them a try since loria has been recommending them)
Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace by Foo Fighters (to prep for the concert in February)

New Year’s Resolution – Schmesolutions
I am in the top ten percentile of lame resolution makers. Why? Well, because I make resolutions that I know I will keep. Exhibit A: I will not eat any Blue Cheese dressing. Fact: I hate Blue Cheese dressing. Exhibit B: I will not purchase a Colbie Caillat album. Fact: I can’t stand her. That being said here are some lame albeit real resolutions for 2008:
I will not purchase a whole CD when I only want three or less songs off the album.
I will try not to mock Vegan Joe and his quirky (drunken) statements (oh, and I won’t make fun of his virtual-reality dragon named Bolt.)
I may or may not purchase a house and/or townhouse.
I will go and visit my Grams.
I will teach Lucy three more songs that are not children’s music (I am thinking Pink Floyd, Ramones and Toto)

Look for my baseball resolutions in April 2008!

Happy New Year’s!!!

Live those dreams/Scheme those schemes/Got to hit/hit me/hit me with those laser beams

Well, jingle freaking bells.
Just call me Scrooge. I can’t find my freaking Christmas spirit. I wrapped all my fucking Christmas presents whilst listening to Christmas music and yet….nothing. I am watching Elf and drinking cocoa and…zilch. Maybe to capture the true Christmas spirit I need to drink orange juice and coconut rum whilst listening to Led Zeppelin.

God is a Middle Aged Woman (the title of an Ezra Furman song)
It must be true. Today I was going to torture myself by heading to Target/Wal-Mart/Grocery store to finish/start my Christmas shopping. Well, maybe the Gods were smiling down on me and taking pity since there was absolutely no one at the stores. Oh, it could also be the fact it was 7:00 a.m. on a Saturday morning in the middle of snow/slush storm. Either way, thanks to all who stayed away from me!

Just look at her, for fucks sake
“JenJen-lookit-JennyJen-lookatme.” What, Lucy? “Lookatme-JenJenJenny-watchme-Jen.” I am watching. “Jen-watchmewatchme-JenJenny.” Yes, Lucy, I am watching. “JennyJenJen-lookwatchmelook.” Seriously, Lucy…I am watching. “JenJen-lookatmelookatme-Jen.” Yeah, that was kind of annoying to read, right? Try listening to it. Sheesh, I don’t think Lucy gets the whole “cause and affect” theory right now…Lucy, when I answer, you can stop asking. Last night I took her to the Midtown Global Market to run around. We were lucky to listen to some live music being provided by Gumption Trap (difficult to explain what style of music they play but kids sure love dancing to it.) Maybe it is because I am not a mom and only an auntie that I feel this pressing need to make sure she is extra safe and okay at all times (borderline smothering.) I have sworn not to be a Full House episode and bring home the wrong baby.

Video Advent Calendar – 2 ½ Days (one of them working) until Christmas Eve
Thanks to Amy for the idea of today’s video. Amy leaves for North Dakota tomorrow morning to surround herself around family and we were talking about how that can tense a body up. Well, she quoted a little Frankie Goes to Hollywood and an idea was born. Not only do I give you a little “Relax,” I give you the banned version.

Frankie Goes to Hollywood – Relax


Note: It was very difficult to find a few lines out of “Relax” that wouldn’t make me blush knowing my aunt was reading them.

“I just wrote the best song I’ve ever written – hell, I just wrote the best song that anybody’s ever written!”

Irving Berlin quoted the morning after he wrote White Christmas

Thou shall not throw someone under the bus
I was reading the sports headlines this morning and these two stuck out:
Schilling: If guilty, Clemens should return Cy Young awards
Compared to A-Rod, Michael Jordan and Joe Montana were playing for peanuts.

Schilling sure likes to talk a lot, doesn’t he? He’s always calling someone out for something or other.
I know, I know. I obviously don’t like A-Rod so it makes me prejudice towards any stories.

Non-Baseball

I aspire to this?
Here is what I did this morning:
Cleaned my office (with cleaning products)
Downloaded Ezra Furman & the Harpoons album
Attempted to flirt with the Starbucks guy this morning
Said eight swear words (due to a paperclip getting stuck in my damn keyboard)
Updated my calendar
Drank coffee

Well, hells bells. What am I going to do for the rest of the f-ing day?

One more time, go ahead, ask me one more time
In the Land O’Cubicles - In response to the question “Any big holiday plans?” I will now be answering with “Nope.” This is mostly because I am sick of responding, replying and being polite. The last two meetings I had started with this question. Hey, I am not anti-holiday but I am anti-wasting-my-time.

RIP: Orange and Blue
Lucy’s two Beta fish have gone to the giant fish tank (that sat overnight to make sure the water was filtered) in the sky. Orange (the red fish) and Blue (the purple fish) were attempted to be replaced by Stacy, alas only half of the duo is miraculously back. It’s a good thing Lucy is only two years old and can be easily fooled.

Video Advent Calendar – 4 days until The Day
I decided to be a good holiday girl and use a traditional song.

Bing Crosby – White Christmas (stickman version)

Whooah, we're half way there/Livin on a prayer/Take my hand and we'll make I swear/Livin on a prayer

Okay, this isn’t really “baseball” related (but hey, we are still waiting for the World Series to start) but today is Stacy’s two year anniversary of meeting Lucy for the first time. So, in honor of the cutest little Twins fan…

Two years ago today I was sitting in this very house, all alone. No, this isn’t an introduction to Celine Dion’s “All by Myself” song. This is the anniversary of Lucy’s adoption. Just a little over two years ago I spent the weekends sleeping in, taking naps, listening to music with swear words and watching movies where people get blown up. A little over two years ago I would drink beer and watch baseball…okay, that part hasn’t changed. Now, with the arrival of Lucy there isn’t much sleeping in, nap time is on her schedule, I end up walking around my office singing Raffi and expressing my hatred of the fucking Wiggles. (I mean, I know who they are. Isn’t that bad enough?) Now I watch cartoons (and not Simpson’s or Family Guy kind) and I get excited when my favorite show on Sprout TV’s Goodnight Show comes on (Jakers, the Irish pig.) Well, enough of the romantic ‘How Lucy Changed My Life” verse. After all, at this point two years ago I was sitting in this very house, alone, while Stacy was thousands of miles away meeting her daughter for the first time. My beginning with Lucy was still a week away.

I know, this entry is kind of the Anti-Christ for non-children-wanting readers but if I can get sucked into Lucy’s life, I am sure you all can too. She’s pretty damn cool. You name one other two year old who can sing Bon Jovi’s “Living on a Prayer” or Jimmy Buffet’s “Margaretville.” You show me another two year old who can dance and try to sing along with “Stuck in a Moment” by U2. Find me another two year old who feels it’s her job to tell me that my coffee is hot every time she sees me with a cup of it. Yeah…Lucy’s one a gazillion but looks like everyone who knows her are the winners. (Okay, that part was kind of sappy, just deal.)

Tonight Stacy, Lucy and I will be going out for African food to celebrate her time with us.

Beer is to Baseball as Horrible is to Mondays

Well, Lucy is now two years old and she thinks she can dress herself. I personally think anything goes with a Morneausey t-shirt, especially a pink and green nightgown. Let’s hope she can beat up the other toddlers at daycare if they make fun of her.

Why does it always rain on me?/ Even when the sun is shining / I can’t avoid the lightning
-Travis

Last night I channeled someone much hipper and much cooler than my actual self. I was invited last minute (well, 30 minutes before doors open) to a concert by my friend Liat. The Scottish band Travis was playing at First Ave so I decided to suck it up and be adventurous. Now, I don’t want to fill this baseball blog with all my new found Travis groupie-ness (seriously, this band rocked) but I felt like I need an explanation for why my brain is fried today. Too much dancing, too much drinking, too little sleep.

Why beer is for baseball (the at-home version):

* On Friday I drank my last two beers whilst watching the game. I am normally a one-beer-gal but the tight game drove me to the second one. I made a mental note to buy more.
* I tried to drink this horrible locally made strawberry wine to be frou-frou whilst watching the game but it was horrible (as stated above) so I switched to beer.
* It isn’t as cool to hold a fancy goblet when sitting cross-legged on the sofa.
* When you get to three beers and you feel a little tipsy you don’t need anyone else to watch the game with, because you can hold a conversation by yourself.
* It is fun to train the toddler how to get the beer.
* It is not fun to try and distract the toddler from throwing a fit because they want a drink of the beer.
* When the game gets sticky you can always go get a beer.
* Mmm…beer.

Well, it was a good weekend for baseball. We won the series against The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (Gregg hates that name.) I didn’t get to watch the game yesterday which turned out to be the best one to skip. I will have to peruse the blogs to get a play-by-play.

I don’t have much else to write about (especially witty or funny) because I killed off a lot of brain cells last night.

Hell of a weekend for baseball

Here's Lucy!

What a beautiful weekend of baseball. We had a series with the Blue Jays and started a series with our arch-enemies, White Sox. In the three games I went to I had four beers, one brat, one root beer float, one pretzel, one bag of cotton candy (pink) and a giant soda.

Friday night
Since Steve is now a lawyer we used his perks to score the sweet Dorsey & Whitney (law firm) seats. We sat 14 rows up from home plate (close to our “on deck” circle) and it was amazing. After I got over my initial nervousness of being just shy of the safety netting (we could have potentially gotten smacked by a foul ball (and me without my helmet) I settled in to enjoy the running commentary from Steve. Here is a snippet of the conversation:
Steve: Hey, where is Joe Mauer? I wanted to see Joe Mauer squatting in front of us!
Jen: He’s hurt; he has a hamstring injury that is taking the world’s longest time to recover.
Steve: - pouting –
Jen: Wow, the Bat Boy is cute from this angle.
Steve: He has to be at least 18, right?
Jen: Let me text message Amy.
Jen: Oh, Amy says we are pervs for thinking that.
Steve: He looks nice; I think he has potential for hotness (he’s talking about Cirillo)
Jen: Mmm…
Steve: Did you see that? He’s cute? What does that sign mean?
Steve: What’s happening now?
Jen: Mmm…

Yeah, by the fourth inning I was using my “Selective Hearing” to filter Steve. I did have lot so fun at the game with him and I owe him big time for the tickets, beer and root beer float.

Saturday night
I was living the single gal’s nightmare on Saturday evening. I was crammed in the upper deck in the middle of the row between toddlers and a breast feeding mom. We were celebrating Bennett’s second birthday – Happy Birthday Bennett! The game was good (although the end result of losing after 13 innings wasn’t good) and I think Lucy enjoyed the game. I did get Lucy a Morneausey t-shirt that she can now wear with pride.

Sunday afternoon
Amy, her parents and I enjoyed a fun game, which ended with our winning. Still no Baby Jesus in the line-up but Barty (Bartlett) was back at Shortstop. It was Armed Forces Appreciation Day so we had singing, flags, awards and video messaging from overseas. I will admit that I did tear up a time or two.

Monday afternoon
I wasn’t at the game and I only caught the last three innings but I guess they were the best. What an awesome game made sweeter by the Pierzynski drama. Like Ozzie Guillen said “If he’s not on your team, you hate him. If he is on your team, you hate him less.” Pierzynski is the man everyone loves to hate, including me.

Well, before I sign off I would like to make note that I will be gone for a week and unable to update this blog. I hope to follow the game on recaps but I don’t think they will show them on television, especially not where I am going. I will see you next week if all goes well in Tennessee, Mississippi and Alabama.

Baseball is baseball is baseball, even if the Twins aren't playing

Ah baseball, you are a rollercoaster of emotions!
Here we are in the hangover stage of American Idol and its new winner (no I haven’t been watching but it is all that is on the television this morning) and I am feeling good. Why? Well, the Twins had a great game yesterday that I got to follow while watching the big storm roll through downtown Minneapolis. It was a toss-up: Do I watch Dave Dahl, the weather guy, to see if I need to go for shelter or do I turn to FSN to watch the Twins? Uh, no contest…Twins!
We have a break today and then start a homestand against the Toronto Blue Jays. I will be at Friday and Saturday’s games for sure with a possibility of Sundays. I will be attending Friday’s game with my friend Steve who just moved home from California to be a big fancy attorney at a big fancy law firm. Anyways, he scored sweet seats through the firm and we are going to drink beer whilst watching the boys (let’s just say one of us will be watching for baseball and the other will be watching for a new potential boyfriend.) Saturday I will be tagging along to celebrate Bennett’s 2nd birthday. Lucy will be there so I can’t wait to teach her all about the game. Of course, she is two years old so I will probably be trying to: a.) keep her from going over the railing, b.) keep her busy so she doesn’t become destructive and c.) keep her out of my way so I can watch some baseball. Either way, she is going to look freaking adorable in one of her new baseball outfits.

Other baseball news (aka Life beyond the MN Twins)
After arriving home from happy hour I turned on ESPN to catch whatever game they were highlighting for the evening. I guess I should stop being surprised when every game showed by ESPN is a Yankee game. It was a pretty big match-up though: Pettitte for the Yankees and Shilling for the Red Sox.

On a catty/snotty note (remember…this is Lipgloss & Baseball and today’s lipgloss color is Bitchy): I guess the bazillions of dollars that the Yankees are paying for their Dream Team aren’t going to good use. Carl Pavano, the $40 million man, may be at the end of a not-so-productive career while The Rocket is having a shaky liftoff (pun intended). What? Money can’t buy a winning team? In the end the Yankees took the three-game series by winning this game 8-3. Ouch…okay I better say something nice now. I love Jorge Posada. He is such an awesome player and a cool guy.

Kind of baseball related news:
I have added a new link to Risa’s blog. Risa is a fellow Twins fan and was proposed to last year at a Twins game via the Scoreboard monitor. How awesome is that!!!

So many points and yet still two losses

Things could be worse. Suppose your errors were counted and published every day, like those of a baseball player. ~Author Unknown

Ah, here it is a lovely and warm Monday morning. Forget for a moment the start of another long week. Instead, let’s focus on this weekend’s baseball excitement. There was a lot that happened so I am going to be brief in my recap:

Amy and I went to the game on Friday, both sporting our Santana #57 t-shirts. Alas, the power of Cotton/Poly-cotton blend would be no match for Maroth and the Tigers.
· I had my beer, my brat and my helmet sundae in hopes that tradition would power our bats.
· I used my high-powered Binoculars (‘Nocs) to watch the game from the cheap seats. I also used them to find Bruce who had seats across from me in the dome (he was left field and I was center field.) In a girly way (the Lipgloss portion of this blog) we used them to get a better look at our favorite players.
· Very trashy people sitting in front of us, a mom and her two teenage daughters. I was distracted from the game during a classic Mother/Daughter fight over a cell phone. Normally I would end this bullet point with a comment about them being from Norwood-Young America or Anoka but I will refrain from making fun of those particular suburbs.
· Bruce (co-worker who attended only his second baseball game) doesn’t know shit about baseball. That’s okay, he asked questions and now hopefully learned from the experience that he is supposed to cheer for the Minnesota Twins even though he likes Detroit’s uniforms better (Orange is the new Black.)
· Losing sucks.

Saturday, due to conflicts, I only caught the last inning of the game but was saddened to see we were losing 8 to 2.

I waited all day Sunday for the very special Mother’s Day/Pink Bats/ESPN Broadcast game to start. I had my beer and was on the sofa trying to get Lucy to say Baseball and Morneausey. (Note: Every time I said “Morneausey” she would point at her nose and go “Nose”.) What a game! There was one point in the second inning that I almost felt bad for the rookie Detroit pitcher, not bad enough to wish our guys would stop swinging the bats. 16 to 4, a nice way to showcase ourselves on National television. For the record, I would rather we spread the points around and win more games by a small margin than less games by 12 points. Know what I mean?

Ponson is gone. The reassigned him away from the Dome, away from where he struggled, away from where he choked. Now the question is…who do we bring up? Garza or Baker?

Let the countdown begin...

Here Lucy is at her 1st Twins game on her 1st birthday!

60 days until Minnesota Home Opener
60 days until I am sitting in Section 233, Row 12, Seat 1
60 days until I have to decide which Twins t-shirt I will wear
60 days until tailgating
60 days until the Twins Rally in the IDS Crystal Court
Which leads into 60 days until I have to think of a reason for being absent from work during the rally time
60 days until I get goose bumps and teary eyes from the 2006 montage
60 days until the introductions of our players are made on the field (some of them starting with: Your 2006 Cy Young…, Your 2006 MVP…, Your 2006 Golden Glove…, Your 2006 Batting Champion…)
60 days until BASEBALL!!!

Are you ready for some baseball news? It appears that New York’s Yankee Stadium will be hosting the 2008 All-Star game. 2008 will also be the last season that the Yankees will be playing in Yankee Stadium as they will be moving to their new stadium. What will happen to the House that Babe Ruth Built?

So have I have been throwing around this idea of going to New York to watch the MN Twins play against the NY Mets in June. I haven’t finalized anything yet so I don’t know if I am going to drive or fly or teleport. I did ask Amy if she wanted to go but she’s non-committal at this point *hint, hint* and I know that Stacy would love to go back to New York *alternative hint, hint* so there are options out there.

Did you know the distance from the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome to Shea Stadium is 1214.80 miles? That would take about 19 hours and 20 minutes to drive (according to Mapquest). Roadtrip anyone?