Well, color me shocked and awed. The Twins came in to the game and scored 11 f-ing runs! Unfortunately, yours truly went to bed early. I caught the first two runs (which looked like classic Twins scoring) and then tore myself away from the television. It was going on 10:00 p.m. and I still had to bake cookies for an office potluck. (Office Space, anyone?) I heard my phone ringing “I don’t care if Monday’s blue / Tuesday’s grey and Wednesday too / Thursday I don’t care about you / It’s Friday I am in love” but I was in a very detailed part of my baking (breaking the perforated dough pieces and placing them on a baking sheet) so I couldn’t grab it. Amy was calling to tell me that Barty hit a homerun. Way to go Barty! In fact, way to go everyone. 11 runs, that’s great. However, not to be Dr. Doom or any other evil characters but I am going to say what most of the other blogs are saying right now. Please, can we space this shit out? Spanking a team every few months whilst struggling to get runs on the board the rest of the time is embarrassing. Not only for you, for me too. Some may call me narcissistic but it’s true. I try to be a good Twins fan. I have a dozen t-shirts, a few hats (that I never wear), bumper stickers, a MN Twins spare tire cover on my Jeep and a freaking Twins antennae topper. I am hardcore. I drink, swear at the television, eat sunflower seeds, keep score (occasionally), jeer, chant, defend, use nicknames, high-five, alienate my non-baseball friends and talk stats. (I do draw the line at spitting.) In other words, I am here to stay. However, I would like to not have to fight in the schoolyard with other people defending you. (Yes, the whole “me” thing again.)
So, to end on a happy note: The Twins beat the Mariners 11 – 4 last night. Today’s game is on at 3:35 p.m. CT so I won’t feel guilty about going to bed and missing a game.