Monday, December 31, 2007

I’ll be alright on my own/Don’t worry about me/Pack your bags, your alibis/And do whatever’s gonna set you free

Girl’s night
Stacy sublet Lucy to my aunt and uncle last night so we had a good old fashioned Girls Night. We saw Juno, ate Thai food (Tum Rup Thai) and went music shopping at Cheapo’s. We also (which may embarrass Stacy for stating this publicly) watched the fifth disc of the sixth season of Gilmore Girls. I spent the whole evening comment on how I was freaked out/excited that Stacy was actually sitting down and chilling with me. (Being a single parent with an exuberant blog community keeps her going.)

Juno, the film
Honestly, there are very few films out there that whilst I am watching them I covet the soundtrack. Juno is one of them (the other being Elizabethtown.) First, the film was amazing. Hands down one of the most entertaining and funny films of the year, if not more. Second, the soundtrack is absolutely amazing. Seriously, check it out.

Music, the addiction
Being inspired by the soundtrack of Juno and being conveniently located across the street from the city’s greatest used music store, Cheapo’s. Well, since I have no willpower and/or control AND they have the greatest Modern Rock collection I left with four CDs:

Neon Bible by Arcade Fire (yes, I finally broke down and bought it, damn hype)
America by Romantica (I decided to give back to one of the local bands)
Scottish Fiction by Idlewild (I thought I would give them a try since loria has been recommending them)
Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace by Foo Fighters (to prep for the concert in February)

New Year’s Resolution – Schmesolutions
I am in the top ten percentile of lame resolution makers. Why? Well, because I make resolutions that I know I will keep. Exhibit A: I will not eat any Blue Cheese dressing. Fact: I hate Blue Cheese dressing. Exhibit B: I will not purchase a Colbie Caillat album. Fact: I can’t stand her. That being said here are some lame albeit real resolutions for 2008:
I will not purchase a whole CD when I only want three or less songs off the album.
I will try not to mock Vegan Joe and his quirky (drunken) statements (oh, and I won’t make fun of his virtual-reality dragon named Bolt.)
I may or may not purchase a house and/or townhouse.
I will go and visit my Grams.
I will teach Lucy three more songs that are not children’s music (I am thinking Pink Floyd, Ramones and Toto)

Look for my baseball resolutions in April 2008!

Happy New Year’s!!!

Thursday, December 27, 2007

And at the show on Tuesday/She was in her mindset/Tempered furs and spangled boots

To make this officially basebally
Here is Gregg (who hates to be referenced in my blog but I am desperate) holding a sign. If any of you knew Gregg you would know that he hates signs, the wave, throwing back opposing homerun balls and our mascot.

Seriously, there isn’t anything going on in the world of baseball. Heck, there isn’t even a “classic” game being aired on FSN. What’s a gal to do? Well, this gal is going to write about non-baseball stuff.

Half-assed Music Review
Babyshambles. Right now I have been driving everyone in the Land O’Cubicles bonkers by talking about Pete Doherty and the newly released “Shotter’s Nation.” Actually, I am listening to it right now whilst sitting in my cubicle (not working, naturally.) I am a new Babyshambles fan but have been a Libertines fan for a while. Shotter’s Nation is fan-fucking-tastic (I had to swear, it is so Pete-like.)
Anyways, check out this photo of the band. I mean, you can’t get any more rockstar than that! You can practically smell the gin, Carlsberg beer and stale cigarette (?) smoke.

I am about to embark on the most insane thing of my 28 years on this planet (besides that one road trip Michelle and I took to see Joey McIntyre in concert in Chicago a few years ago.) House buying. Holy crap, my OCD is in such disarray. I have no freaking clue what I am doing. One part of me wants to read all “Buying for Dummies” and bank brochures whilst the other part wants to just close my eyes and sign on the line. Yeah, I know which side will win but wouldn’t it be more fun to just do it blindfolded?

Overheard on my bus
I overheard the following conversation yesterday afternoon between two preppy looking teenagers:
Teen girl 1: Oh my god! Tara just texted that that Nick and Miley are dating!
Teen girl 2: No way! He is way too good for her.

At this point I turned off my iPod to eavesdrop on their conversation (or “convo” if you are 14 years old.)

Teen girl 1: Okay, I just told Tara that had to be a rumor.
Teen girl 2:

Okay, so the scariest part of their conversation so far? The fact I know who the hell they are talking about. Nick Jonas (of the Jonas Brothers) and Miley Cirus (of Hannah Montana.) Don’t ask me why. Seriously. Don’t.

Teen girl 2: Well, Joe is the cutest one anyways.
Teen girl 1: No, Nick is.

And at this point I am smiling to myself remembering back 18 years ago when my friends and I got into fights about which New Kids on the Block member was cuter (Joey, hands down.)

Teen girl 1: Well, Joe wears a purity ring to prove that he’s going to stay pure until marriage.
Teen girl 2: Oh. (sounding very bummed out) that is lame. Do they all plan that?

At this point I had to cough in order to cover up my snort of laughter.

Teen girl 1: That’s okay. He may just be saying that because they have to be good role models.
Teen girl 2: Yeah, I hope so.

Oh man, I am old.

Amy, that is why I was looking up Jonas Brothers on Wikipedia when you called…not because I have a new obsession with underage boy bands.

And because I can't resist...
The Kooks – She moves in her own way

Monday, December 24, 2007

‘Roid Rage/Human Growth Rage

I sure do hope spring training comes soon. They only things filling the sports news slots are reactions to the Mitchell Report (ba, ba, bum) and rumors. Skip to the end for non-Mitchell Report baseballness.

We have all commented on or mocked the Mitchell Report (which now has an Olympic like theme for the opening, thank you) that was released last week. My Land O’Cubicles has been in a flurry taking names down and keeping track of who is reported, who denies and who admits usage. With the release of Knoblauch’s name many of my crazy-drinking-baseball-game-attendees have been preening righteously. I guess after ten years the hurt feelings have not gone away. To quote Mr. Darcy:

Maybe it’s that I find it hard to forgive the follies and vices of others, or the offenses against me. My good opinion, once lost, is lost forever.” – Pride & Prejudice, Jane Austen.

I think the one thing that was highlighted for me, in a very shallow way, is Schilling martyring himself out in the following article:
Schilling Calls on Clemens to give up Cy Youngs if Rocket doesn’t clear name

Now, it appears that Clemens is speaking out (via Youtube):

I guess we will get all the details in his interview with 60 Minutes.

Twins Fest 2007!
January 25 – 27 will have the Metrodome all in a flutter with meeting our new players and sighing in relief over the ones we kept. This lipgloss-wearing gal will most likely be there but you won’t see her standing in any autograph line. (I just don’t have the attention span and dedication for that.) I am more of a people watcher, early ticket buyer and shopper. I am betting that many of you will be there also. Who will you be standing in line for?

Dear Santa, all I want is to get out of this cubicle sometime today!

12 Days of Christmas in the ‘Hood
Each year I create my own version of 12 Days of warned, there is blatant use of non-Christmasy things!
On the 1st day of Christmas my true love gave to me

… One roll of Crime Scene Do Not Cross tape
On the 2nd day of Christmas my true my love gave to me
… Two shootings on the bus
On the 3rd day of Christmas my true my love gave to me

… Three members of the Bloods (gang) arrested
On the 4th day of Christmas my true my love gave to me

… Four scents in the Southside perfume (chicken wings, Drakkar for Men, Marijuana, Mad Dog 40-40)
On the 5th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

…The Ghetto Number Five
On the 6th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

… Six Chicken Wings for $1 (King o’ Wings Shack)
On the 7th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

… Seven suburban co-workers educated about designer LSD drugs
On the 8th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

… Eight ratty fake fur trench coats (that need a good combing)
On the 9th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

… Nine pirated DVD’s for sale
On the 10th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

… Ten babies’ mamas
On the 11th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

…Eleven Metro Transit police on one bus
On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me

…Twelve Shot Spotters in a three block radius

My Christmas Cubicle Reading
‘Twas the day before Christmas Break
And the office was quiet as a grave
Only the die hard employees were around
Due to boss absences mischief was abound

The remaining workers were snug in their cubicles
Watching the clocks for ‘time to go’ visuals
With Cookies being shared
And Christmas Music in the air
Would four o’clock here get here?

Now Clients, now Computer, now Telephone and Ergonomic Keyboard!
On Co-workers, on Bell Ringers, on Sugar Free Candy and Starbucks
From the IDS Building to South Minneapolis
Now go away, go away, go away all!

Alas, it was only noon and many hours were missing
It was time to invent some office games to keep busy
There was Chair Spinning and Office Supply Treasure Hunt
My team was losing it was time to punt (nice rhyme, eh?)

Four o’clock came and we sprang from our adjustable chairs
Away we flew like we hadn’t a worry or care
But they heard me exclaim with glee
Happy Holidays to all and to all a good day off
After all we still have to be Politically Correct now don’t we.

And to finalize my Video Advent Calendar….

Video Advent Calendar – Today is the day!!!
From my previous post you may be able to tell I am having a hell of a time finding that good old Christmas spirit. So, in hopes of unburying it from my cold, dead heart I give you…Alvin and The Chipmunks. I was the prime age for these guys when it was popular 15/20 years ago.

Alvin and the Chipmunks – Christmas Music Melody

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Live those dreams/Scheme those schemes/Got to hit/hit me/hit me with those laser beams

Well, jingle freaking bells.
Just call me Scrooge. I can’t find my freaking Christmas spirit. I wrapped all my fucking Christmas presents whilst listening to Christmas music and yet….nothing. I am watching Elf and drinking cocoa and…zilch. Maybe to capture the true Christmas spirit I need to drink orange juice and coconut rum whilst listening to Led Zeppelin.

God is a Middle Aged Woman (the title of an Ezra Furman song)
It must be true. Today I was going to torture myself by heading to Target/Wal-Mart/Grocery store to finish/start my Christmas shopping. Well, maybe the Gods were smiling down on me and taking pity since there was absolutely no one at the stores. Oh, it could also be the fact it was 7:00 a.m. on a Saturday morning in the middle of snow/slush storm. Either way, thanks to all who stayed away from me!

Just look at her, for fucks sake
“JenJen-lookit-JennyJen-lookatme.” What, Lucy? “Lookatme-JenJenJenny-watchme-Jen.” I am watching. “Jen-watchmewatchme-JenJenny.” Yes, Lucy, I am watching. “JennyJenJen-lookwatchmelook.” Seriously, Lucy…I am watching. “JenJen-lookatmelookatme-Jen.” Yeah, that was kind of annoying to read, right? Try listening to it. Sheesh, I don’t think Lucy gets the whole “cause and affect” theory right now…Lucy, when I answer, you can stop asking. Last night I took her to the Midtown Global Market to run around. We were lucky to listen to some live music being provided by Gumption Trap (difficult to explain what style of music they play but kids sure love dancing to it.) Maybe it is because I am not a mom and only an auntie that I feel this pressing need to make sure she is extra safe and okay at all times (borderline smothering.) I have sworn not to be a Full House episode and bring home the wrong baby.

Video Advent Calendar – 2 ½ Days (one of them working) until Christmas Eve
Thanks to Amy for the idea of today’s video. Amy leaves for North Dakota tomorrow morning to surround herself around family and we were talking about how that can tense a body up. Well, she quoted a little Frankie Goes to Hollywood and an idea was born. Not only do I give you a little “Relax,” I give you the banned version.

Frankie Goes to Hollywood – Relax

Note: It was very difficult to find a few lines out of “Relax” that wouldn’t make me blush knowing my aunt was reading them.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

“I just wrote the best song I’ve ever written – hell, I just wrote the best song that anybody’s ever written!”

Irving Berlin quoted the morning after he wrote White Christmas

Thou shall not throw someone under the bus
I was reading the sports headlines this morning and these two stuck out:
Schilling: If guilty, Clemens should return Cy Young awards
Compared to A-Rod, Michael Jordan and Joe Montana were playing for peanuts.

Schilling sure likes to talk a lot, doesn’t he? He’s always calling someone out for something or other.
I know, I know. I obviously don’t like A-Rod so it makes me prejudice towards any stories.


I aspire to this?
Here is what I did this morning:
Cleaned my office (with cleaning products)
Downloaded Ezra Furman & the Harpoons album
Attempted to flirt with the Starbucks guy this morning
Said eight swear words (due to a paperclip getting stuck in my damn keyboard)
Updated my calendar
Drank coffee

Well, hells bells. What am I going to do for the rest of the f-ing day?

One more time, go ahead, ask me one more time
In the Land O’Cubicles - In response to the question “Any big holiday plans?” I will now be answering with “Nope.” This is mostly because I am sick of responding, replying and being polite. The last two meetings I had started with this question. Hey, I am not anti-holiday but I am anti-wasting-my-time.

RIP: Orange and Blue
Lucy’s two Beta fish have gone to the giant fish tank (that sat overnight to make sure the water was filtered) in the sky. Orange (the red fish) and Blue (the purple fish) were attempted to be replaced by Stacy, alas only half of the duo is miraculously back. It’s a good thing Lucy is only two years old and can be easily fooled.

Video Advent Calendar – 4 days until The Day
I decided to be a good holiday girl and use a traditional song.

Bing Crosby – White Christmas (stickman version)

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Yo Frodo, what you doin’ wearing the ring’/All powerful jewelry, is that your new thing’

SBG posted yesterday that the Mariners are interested in Hi Ho Silva “The Chief” and the numbers being thrown around are four years for $44 million.

Low and behold, I have added a few new links to my sidebar in hopes of giving props to the right kind of people.

Jeff Shreve – displaced MN Twins fan (with devilishly good taste in music)
Babes Love Baseball
Yeah, Buddy
K-Bro’s Blog
Win Twins
And a special shout out (man, I hate that term) to Curlz of Curlz & Curveballs to give her a gentle reminder to update her damn blog.

Non-Baseball News

Musica Musica
* My top new band found in 2007, Travis, is set to record a new album in February
* Conor Oberst (of Bright Eyes) is playing two “on the down-low” concerts December 29 and 30 at the 400 Bar. What’s the hush-hush all about?
* Foley, Snake, Patrick and I will be rocking out at the Foo Fighters in February
* Wednesday night is a big line up at First Avenue with Belfast Cowboys, Romantica and Stook. To quote the Clash, will I stay or will I go?
* You can sample The Feelings brand (spanking) new single at their Myspace page. It is pretty damn catchy.

* The local publication, The City Pages posted The Year in Music 2007.
* Any Mika fans out there? I am debating whether or not to go to his show in February (Feb 6, First Ave.) and I am curious to know if anyone has seen him before and recommends his live show. I just haven’t heard much from him except one song, which I liked.
* Night of Southern Rock with Marshall Tucker Band, Georgia Satellites and Atlanta Rhythm Section is playing in January at the Hinckley Casino. Throw in a little .38 Special and I am so there.
* I am currently listening to the NPR: Live Concert Podcast of Art Brut and just realized that I love them.

Video Advent Calendar – 5 more days until Christmas Eve (when I celebrate with my family)
So thanks to one of my co-workers in our San Fran office, I found out about this show on HBO called Flight of the Conchords. I just rented the first season on DVD which made me laugh out loud. The video below is in honor of Vegan Joe.

Flight of the Conchords – Frodo, Don’t Wear the Ring

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Happy 100th Blog Entry…to me!

100th post! Can you freaking believe? Well, a few of you can because you are still here reading after a year. I guess I should do something monumental. Maybe a tribute? Naw, I will do something shallow and simple.

To honor my 100th post here is a list of a 100 things about me, Jen, who obsessively watches baseball, who likes to gossip, mock people and well…just read the list and you will find it out

1. I am first and foremost a Minnesota Twins fan
2. I started this blog on January 29, 2007
3. I call Joe Mauer “Baby Jesus” and I sincerely hope it doesn’t offend anyone but that’s how the cookie crumbles
4. I ride the Ghetto #5 bus and I actually like it. It gives me great stories to share
5. I read trashy romance novels and I am only slightly ashamed of that fact
6. I hate the suburbs
7. I got to happy hour every Monday night at Rossi’s with the Monday Night Happy Hour Crew (my judgmental co-workers are just jealous because they aren’t included)
8. I love Brit rock!!! All of it, classic, indie, pop…
9. The only charitable contribution I am giving to right now is for purely selfish reasons (MPR’s 89.3 The Current, I like the free CD)
10. Amy made me like her nerdy Sci-Fi shows and I haven’t forgiven her
11. I have a crush on Geof from the FoodNetwork show “Ace of Cakes”
12. My Sidekick cell phone has an AC/DC Highway to Hell cover
13. I like knowing someone who knows someone who knows bands and musicians
14. My first ever blog started on March 10, 2005 and it is still going strong (I don’t discuss baseball on there unless I talk about why I am hung-over)
15. I have been working in the Land O’Cubicles (my office) for almost eight years (I celebrated my 21st birthday in a cubicle)
16. I played racquetball for fun but then I spent more time making up songs and dances that I never won
17. Coffee is the first thing I think about in the morning and I am not ashamed of that
18. I still tell the story of how I got backstage at the Duran Duran concert two years ago
19. I like movies and television shows where things explode
20. I work in downtown Minneapolis in the IDS Building (3rd floor only)
21. I find myself blogging about mullets more than I should
22. For the last five years I have celebrated by birthday by going to a Twins game
23. I have a giant foam finger (for Twins games) and I am not afraid to use it
24. I didn’t get my driver’s license until I was 25
25. I have read the Harry Potter books but not the Lord of the Rings series
26. I “heart” Orlando Bloom
27. I am almost OCD when it comes to my morning routine (Awake – 5:30, Dry hair – 6:15, prepare coffee – 6:35, walk out door – 6:41)
28. I hate deer
29. I am kind of pissed that when I did all my traveling around Europe I didn’t have a digital camera
30. I have vacationed in Walnut Grove, MN and have worn a bonnet running through the fields in simulation to Little House on the Prairie…twice
31. I have had my nose pierced for a few years now and I often forget that I have it until I get a weird look from a new person in my office
32. The first CD I got was the Sound of Music soundtrack
33. My favorite sushi roll is the Lobster Roll from Martini Blu
34. I like to drink Cider, Blue Moon, Riesling wine, Vodka tonics
35. I really, really like Chic flicks but I hate slapstick comedy (with few exceptions)
36. I keep spamming my friends about the following bands: The Feeling, the Kooks, 22-20s, the Fratellis and Travis.
37. My job title is Communications Consultant
38. My favorite CSI show is CSI: New York (and that’s mostly because the detectives are hotter)
39. I am a little weirded out by the fact my Aunt Karin and I have similar taste in guys
40. I love the smell of vanilla frosting, freshly mowed grass and lilacs
41. I like using the term Hillbilly Heroin
42. I have been brainwashed by the giant company I work for to say “Holiday” instead of “Christmas”
43. I take baseball very personally and any attacks made on the sport, the Twins or my fan-ness will be met with an unfiltered response. Be warned
44. I live for office gossip
45. I hate nature
46. Evidently I have a “type” – struggling musicians
47. I take revenge very seriously
48. I keep trying to give away my cat but I would be sad if someone really took her
49. My niece Lucy is the coolest person in the world (hey, a toddler that sings “Livin on a Prayer” “Listen to the Money Talk” and “Margaretville”…yeah, that’s damn cool)
50. I swear. A lot
51. I am entirely way too dependent on spell-check
52. Sometimes spell-check pisses me off and I wish I could issue it a challenge
53. Chuck Norris jokes make me laugh (Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink)
54. Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy make me laugh harder (If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I’m a coward.)
55. I am not scared of clowns. I am scared of clowns that stand off by themselves and wave at children and then follow them home to kill their family…thanks to that episode of Supernatural.
56. I am obsessed with hating the Wiggles
57. The cake part of a cupcake is empty calories, it is all about the frosting
58. My co-workers like to put me in hypothetical situations that scare me, just to see how I would react
59. I automatically hate the Yankees but I am trying to be a little more open-minded
60. I think in an interview you should be asked “If you were a potluck item, what would you be?” We have had a lot more chips and soda people hired in the last year.
61. My cubicle anthem is the album “Back in Black” by AC/DC
62. I very rarely wear red
63. I like wearing black nail polish
64. I can’t figure out what to get for my tattoo
65. I know the lyrics to “Whoomp, there it is”
66. I saw Joey McIntyre (from New Kids on the Block) in concert four years ago, in Chicago, which I roadtripped with my friend, specifically to see him in concert
67. I always wanted a pony and never got one. However, now that I could potentially get my own I don’t want one, they are kind of scary
68. I love cover bands
69. My favorite thing to say is “Try to fight the stereotype”
70. Sometimes when I am in a co-op or organic grocery store I get a little overwhelmed, like all the other shoppers can tell that I am an imposter
71. The bike messengers in downtown Minneapolis scare me
72. I have a crush on the coffee guy that works at the Starbucks in my building
73. One time these especially hunky firefighters came to our door but it happened to be at the exact moment that Stacy (my cousin), Lucy (my niece) and I were wearing our matching pajamas (to take a photo) that our grandma made us
74. This year my Halloween costume (for the Halloween bar crawl) was jeans, my AC/DC t-shirt and guitar earrings. I believe I won the “Lamest Attempt at a Costume” contest
75. I hate the font Comic Sans
76. I have never completely made it through an entire issue of Harpers Literary Magazine, which I have a subscription for
77. I hate dolphins, I don’t think they are as nice as people want to believe
78. I drove around Ireland, celebrated St. Patrick’s Day in Dublin (there was no parade because of the damn Hoof & Mouth thing) and kissed the Blarney Stone
79. I like the idea of protesting because I have really great ideas for signs
80. I ate Chinese takeout in a Paris Laundromat…more than once
81. Tour buses fascinate me. I want to know who they belong to
82. I rely on other blogs for my information
83. I celebrated when “gianormus” was made a word (now if only that damn spell-check would update it’s library)
84. One of my favorite lyrics are from Rilo Kiley, Portion for Foxes “There’s blood in my mouth ‘cause I’ve been biting my tongue all week/I keep on talking trash, but I never say anything”
85. 10 year high school reunion. Uh.
86. I have a lot of arch-enemies but people are telling me that I can only have one
87. I made it on the Metrodome Jumbotron twice (at one game) this past season
88. I have been to one Minnesota Swarm (professional Lacrosse) game, two Minnesota Timberwolves games, two pre-season Minnesota Vikings games and 100+ Minnesota Twins games
89. I am left handed (I think Stacy made me left handed)
90. I make a lot of fun of the Minnesota suburbs: Anoka (Crystal Meth jokes), Edina (snobs), Maple Grove (fancy), Norwood-Young America (too many to list)
91. There is nothing better in this world than fresh-from-the-oven chocolate chip cookies. Nothing.
92. Sometimes I have to stop and think if I said something out loud or in my head
93. I read fast but not so fast that I am a freak of nature
94. I don’t like doing things I don’t want to do (I really have to make myself do them)
95. I don’t like driving on highways/freeways in the Twin Cities
96. I use reverse psychology on my team-mates and it works most of the time
97. I hate checking voicemail on my cell or work phones. I have no idea why
98. Sometimes when I am on a conference call and I get asked a question but I wasn’t paying attention I say that I was multitasking but I was really looking out my window making up stories about the people walking by
99. I introduced the term “bromance” (non-sexual man-crush) to my office of 150 people
100. I “heart” Dollar Dog Night at the Metrodome (especially with Twingo)

She won’t want me to do it…
Happy Birthday to Amy, my B.F.F, fellow cubicle-dweller, office gossip-monger and my baseball partner in crime!!!

Monday, December 17, 2007

Besides, maybe this time is different/I mean, I really think you like me

Wow, the players are in an uproar these last few days. The headlines on the sporting pages are riddled with “So-and-so denies…” I think within the next few days the hype will die out and be long forgotten, lessons will go unlearned.

New Twins
Mike Lamb (Houston Astros) – Third Base
Adam Everett (Houston Astros) – Shortstop

Non-baseball News:

This very random, business-casual looking guy was in Target this afternoon sporting one of those tear-drop tattoos. I always thought they symbolized that the wearer murdered someone however after using Wikipedia I found there are a few options:
1. He was a “sissie” and his “sugar daddy” had him marked
2. A family member, friend or fellow gang member has been killed
* If teardrop is open or clear – loved one has been murdered
* If teardrop is solid – loved one has killed themselves or was killed in another cause other than murder
* If teardrop has half empty top and half full bottom – loved one has been murdered but their killer was murdered by the tattoo wearer
3. Number of years he has been in prison or the serving of more than one prison term
4. Killed another person
* If the teardrop is solid – that a murder was carried out
* If the teardrop is open or clear – a murder was attempted but failed

So, there is more than you ever needed or wanted to know about teardrop tattoos

My Adventures in the Suburbs
I spent three full days in Maple Grove (aka “the burbs”) cat/house-sitting for Amy. It was like I was in a time warp where I couldn’t leave the house or I would get sucked into a parallel universe. First, Amy’s place is just so damn quiet and comfortable that I read a book I found on her coffee table (Twilight by Stephanie Meyer – yes, ilovedragons, I finally succumbed) and watched the shows she had stored in TiVo (I finally saw the latest episode of CSI: New York after missing four or five.) I also slept for like 14 hours a day. Man, real-life sucks!

Video Advent Calendar – One Week until Christmas (or 7.5 days)
Vegan Joe has been talking about Bright Eyes for the last few weeks (cough*obsessively*cough) so I finally decided to check out the music video he sent me. Yes, the video is sweet but the song is really great!

Bright Eyes – First Day of my Life

Thursday, December 13, 2007

I loved you from the start/’cause Christmas ain’t the time/for breaking each other’s heart

I believe it is time to discuss salary caps
“A-rod set another record for baseball’s highest contract, finalizing his $275 million, 10-year agreement with the Yankees.” Are you kidding me? 275 million real-world-dollars? When I read that I think I threw up in my mouth a little. Ah, my friends, this baseball loving, trash talking gal is a little bitter/peeved about this kind of stuff.

The Mitchell Reports
Wow, the names are really stacking up. Tejada, Clemens, Knoblauch, Pettitte, David Justice are just a few early leaks. I guess we’ll see the entire list at 1:00 p.m. CT.

Last night I stayed out way too late drinking and socializing with my fellow cubicle dwellers. My head hurts. My eyes burn. My throat is sore. Hell, even my hair hurts. In my Land O’Cubicles we have a rule that if you can go out on a work night and whoop-it-up than you better damn well pay the piper the next day and drag your sorry ass to the office. Well, this morning we all made it in but no one is looking very well-off. In fact, one of us (not naming names) is a little green and sensitive to loud noises. Hmm…I wonder if it is cruel that I keep calling his desk phone and giggling when it rings shrilly. Eh, such is life.

Video Advent Calendar – 12 Days Until Christmas
Who doesn’t love the Ramones!!! When I found my favorite cake Punk band had a Christmas video, well, I had to put it on my countdown.

The Ramones – Merry Christmas Baby

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

I’ve had enough/Of this parade/I’m thinking of/The words to say

Since all is quiet on the Mid-Western front…

2007 Year in Review

I started Lipgloss & Baseball: My MN Twins Blog
I wrote by baseball will (in case of my untimely demise)
The first time in 2007 I asked the Baseball Gods why we have Silva
Home Opener!
First use of a swear word in this blog
First open-mocking of Gregg
First use of Tri-Color Foam Wash in my blog
“Pitchers are the best athletes on the field” from Bert Blylevin
My baseball birthday party
Little Piranha fishing lures
Joe “Baby Jesus” Mauer chosen by Hollywood Extra as one of America’s Most Eligible Bachelors
Curls and Curveballs joins the blogging world!
Lucy’s second baseball game
Santana pitched a shutout and buzzed Bert’s hair
Amy and I made it on the Jumbotron twice in one game!
Twins Sisters join the baseball blogging world
I found out Castillo was traded to Mets via Channel 5 News Billboard
Official Groundbreaking of new stadium
Sitting in the Suites (eating free food and drinking free beer)
T.C. The Bear won the Mascot Homerun Derby
My first baseball bloggers meet and greet
I cheated on baseball and went to a MN Vikings football game
TBL and I go to our first game together, no arrests were made
Found out that there is crying in baseball when we had to watch Torii walk off the field for the last time
End of Twins season
I share my new obsession with the bar video game Playboy Photo Hunt
I officially coin a new nickname for my co-worker who likes to piss me off with snotty baseball comments…he shall be known as Ass Clown
Santana received his first Gold Glove award
The first off-season FSN Classic game is shown
First trade of the season brings us Craig Monroe
Sadly, Jason “Eye Candy” Bartlett is traded away from my inappropriate baseball watching comments
First Baseball Blog Year in Review

I know, I know this Year in Review stuff is a tad bit overwhelming since it is EVERYWHERE!!! However, my favorite one is offered by our local NPR affiliate (MPR) 89.3 The Current. So any of you local yokels, go and vote for your top 20 albums of 2007 and sign up for a chance to win an iPod. To The Current, thank you for including Travis, the soundtrack to Once and VHS or Beta on your list. Oh, and thank you for not having James Blunt (my apologies to his fans.)

In case you have a flying care, here is my list (in no particular order):
Romantica – America
The Hives – The Black & White Album
Travis – The Boy with No Name
VHS or Beta – Bring on the Comets
1990’s – Cookies
Lily Allen – Alright, Still…
The Frames – The Cost
The Fratellis – Costello Music
The Alarmist – The Ghost and the Hired Gun
Ingrid Michaelson – Girls and Boys
Radiohead – In Rainbows
Various Artists – Instant Karma, Campaign to Save Darfur
Arcade Fire – Neon Bible
Various Artists – Once: Original Soundtrack
Sondre Lerche – Phantom Punch
Prince – Planet Earth
Robert Plant and Alison Krauss – Raising Sand
WIlco –Sky Blue Sky
Rilo Kiley – Under the Blacklight
The Shins – Wincing the Night Away

You can vote at 89.3 The Current.

Attention to my Family!
Anyone out there know what time we are celebrating on Christmas Eve? I probably should plan accordingly.

Video Advent Calendar – 13 Days until The Day
I am officially declaring Travis as my Top Band I Found in 2007, thanks to Liat (who brought me to their concert.)

Travis – Closer

Monday, December 10, 2007

So I came back to Minneapolis/This time I think I’m gonna stay

Alas, nothing related to baseball
It’s quiet…almost too quiet in the MLB topics.

This week is a big holiday/party week…jealous?
Monday Night Happy Hour – Monday
Going Away Happy Hour – Wednesday
Land O’Cubicles Holiday Party – Thursday
Lena’s Holiday Party – Saturday

The Zep
Led Zeppelin is baaaack. Tonight is the reunion show in London. I can only hope that this may spark a tour!

Video Advent Calendar – 17 Days Until Drinking Bailey’s
This song makes me laugh! I mean, seriously…you have to listen to the lyrics. This video opens up with him singing “Silent Night” and then segues into the best song EVER!!!

Christmas Card from a Hooker in Minneapolis - Tom Waits

One more video…if you can handle it!
Last month I went to Las Vegas with my Aunt Karin, Stacy and Lucy. Here are some of my photos set to music in my Vegas Video Montage.

Friday, December 7, 2007

I can’t stop this feeling/Deep inside of me/Girl, you just don’t realize/What you do to me

Headline of the morning
Twins lose six players in Rule 5 Draft – Three members of the club go in the Major League portion. Well, hells bells…it really hasn’t been our off-season.

Yes iPod, I have enough love for all my shiny gadgets!
Yesterday evening was spent setting up booksmarks on my brand, spanking new computer. Being a product of doing-everything-on-the-computer, I ended up using Google to find this blog since I don’t have it memorized. To my pleasant surprise I found that when I searched “Lipgloss and Baseball” there were a fair number of results pertaining to my blog. I was excited to see I made a cameo appearance on an actual lip gloss themed blog:
Girl Gloss. I also had a shout-out on a MN Vikings football blog (due to the fact I mentioned it was hard to watch a football game in my baseball stadium): Ragnarok – It Ain’t Easy Being a Vikings Fan. Yeah baseball!

Non-baseball related - iObsess
I am now addicted to finding Podcast for my iPod. Currently I am into NPR: All Songs Considered. They have a weekly program that highlights new songs and they also broadcast live from concerts. I found recent shows by Travis, Rilo Kiley and Swell Season (from the movie “Once”). Yeah me!

Video Advent Calendar – 19 Days until Christmas (starting to feel the panic of gift buying)
Okay, don’t be mad but I was thinking of the next video to post and searched for something by The Feeling and got an evil chuckle out of this video instead. Sorry…but you have to watch it. WATCH IT!

Hooked on a Feeling – David Hasselhoff

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Hey flathead don’t check me in / Well hers is a tonic and mine is a gin

And deep breath
The Winter Meetings have wrapped up. It appears that Santana was the belle of the Winter Meeting ball. And yet…nothing happened except for enough rumors to fill Lake Superior. What is going to happen next? Is it weird that I am a little disappointed that there was all this drama, via rumors only and nothing too big? Sheesh…even A-Rod is quiet.

Yes iPod, I have enough love for all my shiny gadgets!
I spent all yesterday evening geeking out over my new laptop. She is shiny, white and faster than Lew Ford’s pinwheel legs (inside baseball joke.) I “heart” her. The world is back on its axis and now I can internet anywhere! ANYWHERE! Also, now I can download the last four episodes of CSI: NY to catch up.

Video Advent Calendar – 20 Days
Ah, this reminds of last summer when I was driving around the fancy suburbs in my Jeep with the sunroof open and blasting this song. Ah, Edina…will you ever be the same again?

Fratelli’s - Flathead

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

So this is Christmas/And what have you done/Another year over/A new one just begun

Sweet baby Jesus! I can’t keep up with all the rumors.
Yanks drop out
BoSox front runners
If Santana goes so will Nathan
Nathan in the wind
Santana Saga
Will Someone Take Johan Santana, please
(that one really sticks me!)

What’s a girl supposed to do? Well, this girl is not clicking on the hyperlinks and getting sucked into that vortex of trade rumors.

Well, I want to wish everyone a happy Winter Meeting season and let’s hope the Baseball Fairy (I picture a mix of Bert Blylevin and that SnackWells fairy) brings us some good news.

Non-baseball ball topic PS: Sportsman of the Year – Favre? Well, he is an icon and he has been playing longer than Moses…oh, and he appears to be a nice guy. The Cheeseheads are happy.

Video Advent Calendar – 22 Days until Christmas
Let’s get back on the Christmassy track here. I present you with one of my favorite song/video around this time of year…maybe even more so this year.

Happy Christmas by John Lennon